Midnight

the time when
darkness is full
and the sky
empty

the time when
i think
that i am
nothing

the time when
uncertainty
insecurity
and insincerity
play

is also

the time when
my mind is empty
yet my heart
so full

the time when
i wake
or sleep
and i feel
everything

and the time when
love
and lust
and freedom
and joy
and magic
happen

–  J.M. (2016)

#TUSAD16

A night of glamour and excitement;

Yeah that was the plan for the Scholar’s Annual Dinner last night. Unfortunately, the event was kinda lame, probably due to the organising committees little whims but nevertheless I still had a great night. It was my first time performing on a stage like that, heck I didn’t even feel nervous once I was on that stage. It was just really invigorating. Also my friends in the audience were really supportive, I could see them waving with their thumbs up signs! I love you guys haha! Our performance was a little off but the more I watch the videos, the better and happier I feel about it! It was actually really quite good.

The greatest part of the night, was not the event itself, but actually the company. We may only be in our first semester, but we get along so well and we have so much fun together. Not all of us were close with each other, but we still felt comfortable to do inappropriate things together and scream and shout and sing and dab like nobody was watching us. That is what fun means to me: Having the time of your life with the people you love, regardless what people think. SBS Babies, te amo. I took many pretty photos of my gorgeous mates but didn’t feel like posted them up here, I did on Facebook though!

I am so looking forward to going to events and activities with these bunch of crazy bitches!

Everything

I see your face in every sunrise,
Of every day, and every sunset,
My morning star.

I see your face in every page,
Of every chapter, of every novel,
Ever written.

I see your face in every photo,
Every post and every article
Shared on my wall.

I see your face in every shadow,
In every street down every alley,
Haunting me.

I see your face in every crowd,
But why can you not see me?

– J.M. (2016)

Precious

I see parts of him in you,
Please know that what I say is true.
Those are the parts of him i fell for,
Perhaps you could be my all and more.

Days come and months go,
You spin stories high and low.
Seas rise and tides ebb,
And now I’m stuck in this sad web.

Dearest one, put down your boulder,
Come over, lean on my shoulder;
Precious one, don’t you cry,
For it pains me to hear you sigh.

– J.M. (2016)

It Isn’t Real

I love the way you hold my hands,
When I might just lose my way.
Every second, every minute,
Every hour of every day.
But then I remember, it isn’t real.

I love the way your teeth shine,
Every time you smile at me.
No words needed, I know you’re mine,
Joy and love as sweet as tea.
But then I remember, it isn’t real.

I see you across the room,
And I know you know I love you.
One short glance and our eyes are locked,
I can’t help it, I’m stuck like glue.
But then I remember, it isn’t real.

I feel your warm skin next to mine,
Before we sleep, a kiss goodnight.
When dawn breaks, so does my heart,
Because I feel emptiness on my right.
And that’s when I remember, it isn’t real.

– J.M. (2014)

Tethered

When our eyes first met,
I knew you’d be my first bet.
Fast forward a year and where are we?
Same room, same place, you’re not here with me.

I used to think you were on my side,
My comfort, my shelter, my place to hide,
From the rocky roads and the stormy sea,
My little secret, safe as can be.

You left me in ruins I know you see.
How cruel of you in the name of honesty?
People said our love was forbidden,
And so my little secret, I kept you hidden.

I should have known better to have tried,
I should have been stronger, instead I cried.
Sometimes I feel as light as a feather,
But deep down I know that I’m still tethered.

– J.M. (2014)