I can find a million reasons to leave, but if you give me one good reason, I’ll stay.
It’s past midnight, when I usually blog. I have been so tired for so many days now, partially due to long days and nights on campus for various reasons. Some days I hang out with my comrades, other days I’m practicing for the annual dinner performance, and there are times that I don’t do anything and just let time pass me by. I could have spent that passed time doing my homework or assignments or just study for my exams, but I just end up wasting my time, without using my phone nonetheless.
I noticed that I notice people less and less these days. I’m not as observant as I used to be. Yes, I still remember faces and names. I don’t know how to describe it but I don’t feel the presence of strangers around me anymore. (also maybe due to the fact I’m talking much more than I used to, even to people I don’t know).
Recently I’ve made a really really great bunch of friends from my class. We aren’t all taking the same courses but for this semester (and majority of the next) we’re in combined classes and I’m loving every bit of it. There is never a dull moment with these assholes, in and outside the classroom. While there is no doubt I love these guys and love every single moment we spend together, admittedly there’s still some trust issues going on. There are things I can’t bring myself to say, even though I actually try to interject once in awhile but I decide to let the conversation sway away. I love (most of) the people in my class; they’re very active, engaging and funny in many ways, but most importantly supportive and interactive.
I’ve also made a few new friends from outside my class. These people come from the clubs I join, the activities I participate in or just hanging out with my friends’ friends, or from the internet (read: dating apps). This group is not as majorly involved in my every day shenanigans, save for a couple of them, two of which stand out more than the others.
These two people have a very long, complicated and dramatic history with one another but it would be rude of me to display what can be considered none of my business here. Both of are my friends but one of them is almost always depressed but I don’t seem to get tired of trying to cheer him up; though there are other parts of said person that I am extremely irritated of. Also I know that if I’m not the one that speaks first, there wouldn’t be a conversation going on. The other one is almost a complete opposite: hilarious and very fun to be with. Talks are always interesting, be it virtual or in the flesh and I miss every time we hang out together (especially karaoke), met some of his friends, which was kinda awkward but I don’t really mind. And if you asked me, I would say I like the latter more. Or at least I’m trying to make myself think that way instead of the truth.
Maybe I’ve said too much.