I know I should mature enough and be above complaining about other people, but there comes the occasion where disappointments just come raining down on me.
Previously, I had already learnt that people can’t be entirely depended on and that reservations had to be held. I tried to start anew with a clean slate, and yet again all these people letting me down. I let down my guard and be lenient with people and this is what I get in return for being nice. For example, now I have a folder sitting on my Mac desktop containing copy-paste jobs that took two weeks for my group mates to send in. Or another example of just waiting around for people who cancel plans at the last minute without any forewarning or acknowledgment. There are people who I can depend on and I’m really happy about it though, but some just really test my patience.
I guess we don’t expect the expected; We really welcome disappointment.
I’m not one who gets angry and throws giant tantrums to show how frustrated I am. It takes a lot to get a physical response from me because I calm myself 24/7. I get irritated often because I have to go out of my way, but in reality I don’t mind putting another person before myself. I keep quiet and put on a resting bitch face because I scare myself at times, and I’m scared of the consequences.
I’m just a really soft person at heart, who needs some tender loving and concern, you just don’t see it much under this brash, loud, assertive front.
– in need of fulfilment –