It’s been awhile since I last posted, I do apologise for my extended leave of absence. I just haven’t had much to put into words. Throughout the past two weeks, my mind had been filled with floating transient thoughts that I felt belonged more appropriately on Twitter than a full-length passage.

Things have been… complicated to say the least. And here I am trying to figure out how to form words from the flashing images in my mind. Needless to say, it’s been a tiring time.

I realise that some people are rather inconsiderate about others, some people take others for granted, some people think they deserve the be treated with grace and dignity all the time; When in reality, the same people are the ones that come off as the typical douchebag or fuckboy. While I understand that we do not always use our built-in thought filters before speaking, some things just cross boundaries. I was already having a not-so smooth week and didn’t need the extra trigger to go ballistic.

Maybe it’s just me and my bad temper. The older I get, the worse my temper becomes. I’m just tired of dealing of negativity so often. I get irritated at the most minute of issues, and then overreact with remorse following soon after.

Or maybe it’s because there has been a lack of stability in my life and it’s starting to take its toll on me. I crave ever present company, I crave stability. I am looking for something to keep me grounded and anchor me to what is real.

Or, maybe I’m just an asshole.

PS: Also, I just really want a new phone. Maybe I’ll be less annoyed and less unhappy then.

Author: Bryan Yap

Food enthusiast, amateur photographer & aspiring revolutionary

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