It’s both funny and confusing; How I am losing my mind, yet feeling my old self again.
I find myself mulling over the petty things, as I always do. But this time I don’t let any of it bother me or the activities I do anymore. When I am involved in an event, performance or any activity in my life, I have conditioned myself to be detached from heart and emotion, relying solely on rationale and mind. To me, emotion clouds judgment, leading to inefficiency. I am not sympathetic, but that doesn’t mean I’m cruel.
It’s one of the things I pride myself on: Being heartless and emotionless.
It does leave me at the end of the day, but I don’t mind. It takes my mind off things, and occupies my time instead of being petty. At the end of the day when my feelings come back, I think to myself, whatever that happened and whoever that you hurt, a good end product/progress justifies it. Mind over matter. When it comes to work, my principal is the process doesn’t matter as much as what the result is.
People who are involved with me, please take note that when I mean business, I don’t play monkey. I trust you enough, don’t waste my time.